I have been doing a lot of school visits this fall. As a former elementary teacher, I love having the opportunity to work with students again. During my visits I get asked many questions, frequently along the lines of "Where do you get your ideas?" and "Is it hard being an author?" but here are some of the more memorable questions I've been asked over the years:#1 "May I touch your hair?"
Yes, if you are gentle.
#2 "What kind of underwear do you have on?"
That's kind of a private question. Does anyone have a less private question?
#3 "Why aren't you married?"
I haven't found the right person yet.
#4 "I got a puppy last night!"
Congratulations! How very exciting!
#5 "My cousin got a puppy two weeks ago!"
That's exciting too.
#6 "My cousin had a puppy that ate an entire box of chocolate covered peanuts and then got sick and threw up all over his bed and then my cousin got sick and threw up too!"
Wow. Does anyone have an asking question about writing or illustrating instead of a telling story?
#7 "How do you write the words so neatly at the bottom of each page of the book?"
Actually, I don't write the words at the bottom of each page. A machine prints the words in the books for me. (When the students discover that I haven't actually hand-written all my books, their admiration for me drops considerably).
#8 "Did you write Harry Potter?"
(When students discover that I haven't written Harry Potter, the Garfield comic strip, or the No, David! books, my esteem plummets further).
#9 "Can you touch the ceiling?"
( I'm 6 feet 5 inches tall. Frequently I can touch the ceiling. Once again, my status rises).
#10 "Are you rich?"
I'm doing what I love. I have a job where I get to use my imagination and be creative. I get to meet fun, appreciative, enthusiastic kids who tell me they love my books.
Am I rich?
You bet.
9 comments:
Great questions. Great answers. And my esteem for you continues to grow.
Can I touch your hair? ;-)
You might not be able to tell from my photo, but my hair extends well past my shoulders. Many kids, especially the youngest ones, are amazed (and sometimes a little confused) that a man can have long hair. Despite my beard, sometimes kindergarteners ask, "Are you a girl?" The girl who wanted to touch my hair told me she thought mine looked very soft, and after touching it, she said that it indeed was. Hooray for conditioner!
David, what a great list of questions, and I, too, am impressed with your answers. I've heard a few of the same ones myself--except no one has been interested in my hair!
Both my brothers have long hair and my hair (as you can see) sticks up and has a life of it's own. I love that kids are so frank, so direct. They keep life fresh.
Very funny blog. Sounds like your audience keeps you on your toes! The hair issue reminds me of a few years ago when my niece saw an old college-era picture of me (my hair started "thinning" 15 years ago) and asked, "Where did Uncle Mark get that hair?" It's true, you never know what a kid is going to say...
David, you are a gentle man. Your manner with the children is a reflection of that. Lucky kids, lucky you, lucky me for getting to know you in blogtime.
I think you could replace Michael Jordan in the Hanes ads...
David, I love these questions. Especially the dog questions that keep building on one another. I can just see the entire class raising their hands to tell more dog stories!
And yes indeed, you are very rich.
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