The deadline to submit my next biography is June 11th. I am not even halfway into this 64-page book. Mornings are the hardest. So, I warm up with other writings, such as this:
INSTRUCTIONS ON HOW TO CHEW GUM
Can you chew gum in school?
Can teachers chew gum in school?
When you are in school
and a teacher walks toward you,
spit the gum out onto your hand.
Quickly, stick it under your desk.
At break, take a look under your teachers' desks.
You'll see how many chewed gums they have.
Principals' are the worse.
Have you ever wonder why teachers
have to hide for lunch in that lounge?
I'll tell you why. They need a freezer.
Before lunch they place their gum in the freezer.
They eat lunch, then they take out a gum
not matter whose is whose. Yikes.
Now you know why, in the afternoons,
teachers look and sound like goats:
Yak. Yak. Yak.
They are chewing frozen gum.